Today’s Headlines

  • ASX 200 up 16 to 61=8 on Budget optimism.
  • High 6111 Low 6083
  • Same range as yesterday. Modest volume again.
  • Dual citizenship issues overshadow Budget.
  • Joyce celebrates.
  • Selected banks crater after CBA update.
  • Miners and energy stocks back in vogue.
  • AUD lower at 74.36c
  • Bitcoin weaker at US$9059
  • US futures up 4
  • Asian markets weaker with Nikkei down 0.58% and China down 0.31%


Movers and Shakers

  • REH +14.77% returned after capital raising success.
  • CYB +5.08% rethink on Virgin Money deal.
  • CGF +5.21% budget proposals positive.
  • JHG +3.68% signs of life.
  • APT +8.22% back in fashion.
  • WTC +5.64% going gangbusters.
  • GXL -22.01% a dog day as results goes woof.
  • JMS -1.33% CEO takes leave on illness.
  • CBA -2.84% March update shows rise in loan arrears.
  • BBN +4.48% brokers upgrade after earnings downgrade.
  • GFY -unchanged- earnings downgrade, throws in towel.
  • CSR -4.42% results disappoint.
  • IPL -5.33% disappointing results. Joins ORI -%
  • Speculative stock of the day: No standouts today. At least not on any volume which is telling in the small-cap space. GXL stood out as the biggest loser. Not cross. Actually, very angry.
  • Biggest risers –REH, CLQ, APT, WTC, WBA and CGF.
  • Biggest fallers –GXL, EHL, IPL, LNK, SWM and CSR.


  • CBA–2.84% Quarterly income and margin weaken. Unaudited net profit came in at $2.3bn from $2.6 in the three months through March. Cash earnings were $2.35bn from $2.4bn reported a year earlier. Third-quarter operating income declined 4% on the quarterly average for the first half of the financial year, and volume growth in the quarter was offset by a slight decline in net interest margin.
  • CSR Ltd (CSR) –4.42% Profit lifts on the back of strong construction activity. CSR reported a 6% rise in net profit to $188m from $177.9 in the previous year. Profits in its Viridian glass business fell around 50% while earnings from aluminium were 15% lower than a year ago.
  • Godfrey’s(GFY) -% Has backed Arcade’s $0.32/share cash takeover offer for its shares.
  • Greencross (GXL) –22.01% Warns on profits as like for like sales fall. GXL now expects underlying EBITDA between $97-100m for the financial year. An impairment charge of $16-20m is also expected. The stock was up 1.5% yesterday and it is sitting 21% below its 52-week high.
  • Challenger (CGF) +5.21% Upgraded to BUY from Neutral by Citi, target price lifted 21% to 1360c. The new target is 14.3% above last nights closing price. The stock is 17.5% off its year high.
  • Telstra (TLS) +0.93% demonstrated a real-life use case for the upcoming mobile network technology with playing the first-person shooter video game Counter-Strike on the Gold Coast.



  • Plenty of Budget talk. Stronger than expected coal and oil prices will help boost the corporate tax take by $5.2 billion over the next four years.
  • Company tax receipts are expected to rise 22.1% this year and another 6.7% next year and Treasury says higher commodity prices are the key reason.
  • Ratings agency S&P, put the Treasurer on notice that the credit outlook remains on “negative outlook” because of growing global risks.



bonds 9.5.18


  • Toyota has blamed the strong yen as it forecasted a 15% drop in net profit in the year ahead.
  • AIA said on Wednesday that it will tie up with Tencent-backed WeDoctor to offer insurance products and other services as competition with rival Ping An Good Doctor intensifies in China’s online healthcare industry.
  • Takeda Pharmaceutical Co.’s largest acquisition would catapult the company into the top 10 within the global pharmaceutical industry. Its agreed US $62bn takeover of much larger Shire Plc would push combined revenue above US$31 billion as the Japanese firm seeks growth in new markets.

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  • Oil in focus in Asia.

oil creeeping hgigher 9.5


  • The prestigious New York Stock Exchange is working on an online trading platform to buy and sell Bitcoin.
  • Japanese human resource company Recruit Holdings said on Wednesday it had agreed to buy San Francisco-based employer review website Glassdoor for US$1.2bn in cash.
  • Vodafone nears a EUR 18bn deal to buy Liberty Global assets.
  • As good as it gets. In March, employers advertised 6.55m open jobs, the most on records dating to December 2000, the US Labor Department said. At the same time, there were 6.59m unemployed.

And finally………………….

The  Washington Post’s Mensa  Invitational once again  asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter  it by adding,  subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new  definition.

Here are the winners:

1.  Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders  the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period  of time.

2. Ignoranus : A person who’s both stupid  and an asshole.

3. Intaxication : Euphoria at  getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was  your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation : Coming  back to life as a hillbilly

5. Bozone (n.): The  substance surrounding stupid people that stops  bright
ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer,  unfortunately, shows little
sign of breaking down in  the near future.

6. Foreploy : Any  misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of  getting laid.

7. Giraffiti : Vandalism  spray-painted very, very high.

8.  Sarchasm : The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit  and the person who doesn’t get it.

9. Inoculatte :  To take coffee intravenously when you are running  late.

10. Osteopornosis : A degenerate disease.  (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon : It’s  like, when everybody is sending off all these  really
bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth  explodes and it’s like, a
serious bummer.

12.  Decafalon (n.): The gruelling event of getting through the  day consuming only things that are good for  you.

13. Glibido : All talk and no  action.

14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid  ideas to seem smarter when they come at you  rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic  dance performed just after you’ve accidentally walked  through a spider web.

16. Beelzebug (n.) : Satan in  the form of a mosquito, that gets into your
bedroom at  three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17.  Caterpallor ( n.): The color you turn after finding half a  worm in the fruit you’re eating.

The   Washington  Post has also published the winning  submissions to its
yearly contest, in which readers are  asked to supply alternate meanings
for common  words.

And the winners are:

1.  Coffee  ,  n. The person upon whom one coughs.

2.  Flabbergasted , adj. Appalled by discovering how much  weight one has gained.

3. Abdicate , v. To give up  all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4.  Esplanade , v. To attempt an explanation while  drunk.

5. Willy-nilly , adj. Impotent.

6.  Negligent , adj. Absentmindedly answering the door when  wearing only a nightgown.

7. Lymph , v. To walk  with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle , n. Olive-flavored  mouthwash.

9. Flatulence , n. Emergency vehicle  that picks up someone who has been run over by a  steamroller.

10. Balderdash , n. A rapidly receding  hairline.

11. Testicle , n. A humorous question on  an exam.

12. Rectitude , n. The formal, dignified  bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon , n..  A Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster , n. A  person who sprinkles his conversation with  Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism , n. The belief  that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and  gets stuck there.

16. Circumvent , n. An opening in  the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish  men

For the audio version of this report click here.




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