Today’s Headlines

• ASX 200 falls another 39 points to 5935
• High 5969Low 5923 Quiet trade after initial falls.
• Tillerson sacked by tweet.’Rexit’.
• Bank in the sights of Royal Commission. CBA tomorrow.
• Franking credits weighing.
• AUD steady at 78.68c
• Bitcoin steady too at US$9150
• US futures modestly lower down 22. Rex who?
• Asian markets slip on trade war potential Japan down 1.04% and China CSI down 0.52%

STOCK STUFF

Movers and Shakers

• A2M -1.23% broker initiation as a buy.
• SMP +15.38% gathering momentum following deal with Alipay.
• ORE +5.59% GXY +9.06% and KDR +8.96% on optimism in lithium.
• XRO +2.56% still as hero.
• BKL +4.95% thin volume but no retails store plan helps
• SWM -4.27% reverses yesterday’s rally.
• WHC +2.15% UBS discusses RIO acquisition.
• AVZ -3.64% half yearly accounts.
• CAT -4.31% runs into profit taking.
• PHK -1.59% rally runs out of steam.
• TAW +14.94% lithium production begins at Bald Hill.
• OFX +7.10% broker upgrades
• LVH +13.07% bouncing back.
• ACX +0.26% shareholder approve scheme from Oracle.
• Speculative stock of the day: ABU +32.91% SBM participates in $6m placement to fund Tamami exploration.
• Biggest risers – KDR, GXY, SYR, ORE, SBM and EHL.
• Biggest fallers – ING, SKT, SWM, HT1, SIG and AVZ.

TODAY

• Inghams (ING) -6.84% private equity group TPG has sold down its stake with 55m shares sold at 360c.
• Rheinmetall Landsysteme has won a A$5bn contract to build 211 combat reconnaissance vehicles for the Australian defence forces.
• National Bank (NAB) -1.22% in the Royal Commission spotlight today. CBA tomorrow. Not making great headlines.

ECONOMIC NEWS

• The Melbourne Institute and Westpac Bank survey of 1,200 people published on Wednesday said its index of consumer sentiment rose 0.2% in March from February when it fell 2.3%.
• The index was up 3.3% on February last year at 103.0, meaning optimists just outnumbered pessimists.
• The survey’s barometer of economic conditions over the next 12 months bounced 1.7% in March, but the outlook for the next five years dropped 4.1%.
• New Zealand posted a wider-than-expected current account deficit in the fourth quarter. On a seasonally-adjusted basis, the quarterly deficit was NZ$1.951 billion, up from NZ$1.544 billion in the previous quarter.

BOND MARKET UPDATE

ASIAN MARKETS NEWS

• Industrial output climbed 7.2% in January and February from a year earlier, compared with the 6.2% projection in Bloomberg’s survey
• Retail sales rose 9.7% from a year earlier, the National Bureau of Statistics said Wednesday, nearly in line with the 9.8% estimate
• Fixed-asset investment excluding rural households increased 7.9%, versus a 7% projection

• MSCI launches 12 new Chinese indices ahead of inclusion of mainland Chinese stocks entering its benchmark emerging markets index for the first time.
• Japanese core machine orders grew at the fastest pace in two years in January.
• Cathay Pacific posts its biggest loss since 2008 as fuel bet goes wrong. Net loss of US$161m.
• Noble Group has signed a debt restructuring agreement.

EUROPE AND US MORNING HEADLINES

• RIP Stephen Hawking. A life well lived.“Look up at the stars and not down at your feet. Try to make sense of what you see, and wonder about what makes the universe exist. Be curious.”
• UK deadline on Russian sanctions has passed.
• Democrats hold a slim lead in the Pennsylvania election.
• China has sold its stake in Blackstone as tension mounts in Sino-US relations.

 

And finally….look away children….thanks Hans as usual a classic..

 

The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by a hostile Indian War Party. The Indian Chief proclaimed, “So, YOU are the great Lone Ranger”… “In honor of the Buffalo Hunt, you will be sacrificed in three days.” “Before we kill you, I grant you three requests. What is your FIRST request?’ The Lone Ranger said, “I’d like to speak to my horse.” The Chief nodded and Silver was brought before the Lone Ranger who whispered in Silver’s ear, and the horse galloped away. Later that evening, Silver returned with a beautiful blonde woman on his back. As the Indian Chief watched, the blonde entered the Lone Ranger’s tent and spent the night. The next morning the Indian Chief admitted that he was impressed. “You have a very fine and loyal horse, but we will still kill you in two days. What is your SECOND request?” The Lone Ranger again asked to speak to his horse. Silver came to him, and he again whispered in the horse’s ear. As before, Silver took off and disappeared over the horizon. Later that evening, to the Chief’s surprise, Silver again returned, this time with a voluptuous brunette, even more attractive than the blonde. She entered the Lone Ranger’s tent and spent the night. The following morning the Indian Chief said:  “You are indeed a man of many talents, but we will still kill you tomorrow.” “What is your LAST request?” The Lone Ranger responded, “I’d like to speak to my horse – alone.” The Chief was curious, but he agreed, and Silver was brought to the Lone Ranger’s tent. Once they were alone, The Lone Ranger grabbed Silver by both ears, looked him square in the eye and said, Listen Very Carefully! FOR…THE…LAST…TIME… “BRING POSSE!”

8 words with 2 meanings…

1. THINGY (thing-ee) n
Female… Any part under a car’s hood.
Male……. The strap fastener on a woman’s bra.

2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female… Fully opening up one’s self emotionally to another.
Male……. Playing football without a cup.

3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni- kay-shon) n.
Female… The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one’s partner.
Male…… Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.

4. COMMITMENT (ko- mit-ment) n.
Female… A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male……. Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.

5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter- tayn-ment) n.
Female… A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male……. Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female… An embarrassing by-product of indigestion.
Male….. A source of entertainment, self-expression, male bonding.

7. MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
Female… The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male…… Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it

8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female… A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male…… A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.

 

Have a great evening

Clarence

XXXX