Morning all,

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This is my last morning email for 2013.It has been a fun ride this year and I hope you have got some good ideas out of this rambling rant in the mornings. I know most of you only read the joke at the end so maybe next year I should just send the joke. Let me know what you think! Anyway it is traditional at this time of year to review the past and look forward to the future. Plenty of that around so I will not add to it. Only to say that 2014 will throw up some interesting challenges as the Aussie dollar continues its downward descent to 80 cents and below, the rest of the World picks up economically and we stutter and lose our mojo somewhat. Not sure Australia is the place to be in 2014 from a invested dollar perspective ..still my crystal ball is a little cloudy and anything could happen…

 

Yesterday we got a big rally. After lunch the bulls just got carried away. No profit downgrades either and with 5200 very firmly in their sights it was game on..Usual suspects were worked higher and higher and suspect that we may see more of that today. Even the second liners were pushed up in thin trade. Cannot see anything to stop that..overnight though Gold got hit, Iron Ore is weakening into the Xmas  period and Chinese rates are on the rise…

 

Won’t get to 5600…fair to say I was wrong on this one and Kit, you were right about the sentiment change about three weeks ago…Maybe 5400 at a pinch…downgrades willing!!

Idea of the Day

CHRISTMAS FRUIT CAKE RECIPE

Ingredients:

1 Cup water

2 Cups dried fruit

1 Tablespoon salt

1 Cup sugar

4 Large eggs

Lemon juice

1 tsp. baking soda

8 oz Nuts

8 oz Butter

1 Bottle Whiskey

 

Method:

Sample the whiskey to check for quality

 

Take a large bowl.

Check the whiskey again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour 1 level cup and drink.

Repeat

 

Turn on the electric mixer, beat 2 oz. butter in a large fluffy bowl.

Add one tsp. of sugar and beat again. Make sure the whiskey is still OK. Cry another tup. Turn off the mixterer. Break two bowls and add to the eggs and chuck in the dried fruit. Mix on the turner. If the dried fruit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.

 

Sample the whiskey again to check for tonsisticity.

 

Next, sift to sups of calt or something. Who cares? Check the whiskey. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

 

Add one table spoon of sugar or something. Whatever you can find. Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees. Don’t forget to beat off the turner. Throw the bowl out of the window. Check the whiskey again and go to bed.

 

Next day, take 3 aspirins -and go to Wollies. Buy Christmas cake.

 

 

Things to make me go mmmmmmmmmmmmm!

 

IPOs have been a major disappointment for the hedge funds and instos this end of year..they are usually free money if you suck up enough..but not this year…shame…anyway another one lists today iBuy…let’s see if it becomes iSell today!!

 

Now renamed Cover Less… Cover-More Group: has become the latest float to disappoint investors this year, after shares in the travel insurance and medical assistance group failed to trade above its listing price of $2 per share on Thursday. Cover-More shares dropped to $1.60 in early trading after listed at noon on Thursday, recovering to close at $1.77.

 

 

Data from the US Labor Department today showed applications for unemployment benefits unexpectedly rose last week to an almost nine-month high of 379,000. The median forecast of 48 economists surveyed by Bloomberg called for a drop to 336,000.A separate report showed previously owned home sales declined for the third consecutive month in November to the lowest level of the year as rising mortgage rates and a limited supply of properties discouraged buyers.Not sure why construction is rising and sales are falling…building too many houses again are we…you know what happened last time!!!

 

Fed balance sheet reaches $4 Trillion!!!Well done Ben..Great legacy!

Fed BS 4trn

 

 

Santos: has recorded a second successful drilling of a shale gas well in the Cooper Basin, resulting in a flow rate that means it will be brought into commercial production. The Moomba-194 vertical well, which flowed at an average rate of 3 million cubic feet per day, is close to Santos’s gas pipeline and processing infrastructure at Moomba.

 

Law firm Maurice Blackburn is investigating action against Worley Parsons after the engineering group was hit by a lawsuit following its shock profit warning last month, with Melbourne City Investments alleging the global contracting group breached its continuous disclosure options.

 

The Chicago Board Options Exchange Volatility Index (VIX) gained 2.5 percent today to 14.15, paring a 15 percent decline from yesterday. The gauge of S&P 500 (SPX) options known as the VIX is down 21 percent this year.

 

EU leaders are meeting in Brussels to approve a common set of rules for managing the closure of failing eurozone banks in an orderly way.Under a plan agreed by finance ministers a 55bn-euro ($75bn; £46bn) fund will be set up, financed by the banking industry, over 10 years.

 

 

And finally….last one of 2014 …thanks for reading through to the end!!

 

A bloke’s wife goes missing while diving off the West Australian coast. He reports the event, searches fruitlessly and spends a terrible night wondering what could have happened to her.

 

Next morning there’s a knock at the door and he is confronted by a couple of policemen, the old Sarge and a younger Constable.

 

The Sarge says, ‘Mate, we have some news for you, unfortunately some really bad news, but, some good news, and maybe some more good news’.

 

‘Well,’ says the bloke, ‘I guess I’d better have the bad news first?’

 

The Sarge says, ‘I’m really sorry mate, but your wife is dead. Young Bill here found her lying at about five fathoms in a little cleft in the reef.

 

He got a line around her and we pulled her up, but she was dead.’

 

The bloke is naturally pretty distressed to hear of this and has a bit of a turn. But after a few minutes he pulls himself together and asks what the good news is.

 

The Sarge says, ‘Well when we got  your wife up there were quite a few really good sizedcrays and a  swag of nice crabs attached to her, so we’ve brought you your share.’ He hands the bloke a sugar bag with a couple of nice crays and four or five crabs in it.

 

“Geez thanks. They’re bloody beauties. I guess it’s an ill wind and all that … So what’s the other possible good news?”

 

“Well”, the Sarge says, “if  you fancy a quick trip, me and young Bill here get off duty at around 11 o’clock and we’re gonna shoot over there and pull her up again!“

 

And bonus Xmas Joke…

 

There was once a great czar in Russia named Rudolph the Red.

 

He stood looking out the windows of is palace one day while his wife, the Czarina Katerina, sat nearby knitting. He turned to her and said, “Look my dear, it has begun to rain!” Without even  looking up from her knitting she replied, “It’s too cold to rain. It must be sleeting.”

 

The Czar shook his head and said, “I am the Czar of all the Russias, and Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!”

 

 

I am manning the Avalon office over the break and will be back on deck in early 2014 to take all those lovely orders..in the meantime I am always available on my mobile or you can ring my assistant Chloe here at the office.

 

Someone has to work..

 

So have a great Xmas and hope Santa brings you everything you desire and that 2014 is a good one for all.

 

Cheers

 

Clarence

XXXX

Get a Global take on things at www.ntmarkets.com

Get a Global take on things at http://www.ntmarkets.com

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