Morning all,

Apologies for the lack of morning emails in the last few days but normal hours are now resumed . I am sure you didn’t even miss my ramblings. Still in the last few days things have started to get somewhat crappy, especially in resource stocks where Gold has been whacked in a similar fashion to the Iron Ore Stocks in recent weeks. The only thing left standing in this so called bull market is the Banks, Telstra and other yield based defensives. So the theme of 2012 continues. As you all will know from my emails I have been suggesting the market was tired for some time and saw us down to 4950 and then a trading range of 4850 to 5150.Well last night the US caught a cold as Jobs numbers were worse than expected and comments from one of the Fed Chiefs on the QEIII or rather the end of QEIII…he thought the US recovery was shifting into higher gear. Really! But then he wasn’t invited to NY to speak ..only LA so maybe he was a little miffed and wanted to steal some thunder!

The markets do look vulnerable to a pullback. It seems that Easter is always a turning point in sentiment and this year is shaping up as no different. I cannot count the number of times I have gone away at Easter for a lovely time ,the markets are all hunky dory and then wallop, back to a harsh reality.

The biggest losers last night were Gold shares overseas plus Oil and energy stocks as US stockpiles of Oil hit a 22 year high..Gold looks horrible and the World and his wife are downgrading Gold hand over fist…race to the bottom in these things..NCM will likely take it pretty badly today as will other golds…not gonna be too much fun there at the moment.

 

Expect our market to be hit hard again today around 50 I would expect before some bargain hunting but will be confined to the usual suspects..

Idea of the Day

 

Patience Grasshopper…charts are showing continued weakness..

 

Things to make me go mmmmm.

1.The Paparrazzi have been taking pictures of Moaning Mertle in a bikini in Italy on holidays..why? Not sure that is an image I would like to wake up to over my cornflakes!

2.A consortium led by Billabong International’s former Americas boss, Paul Naude, is believed to have slashed its takeover offer for the troubled company by more than a third to under 73¢ a share. Mr Naude and New York-based buyout firm Sycamore Partners remain front runners to buy the surf and skatewear maker as negotiations drag into a seventh day.

3.Insurance Australia Group is forecasting double-digit rate rises within its lucrative home cover portfolio for 2014-15, signalling higher insurance costs for consumers.

4.N. Korea army says it has final approval for nuclear attack on US..the question is from whom? The little voices in its head…Meanwhile the US is now moving a missile defence shield to Guam despite them saying that North Korea is not upping its military activity..still they got Iraq wrong as well..somewhat worrying these new developments.

5.Good to see an EX Goldman Sachs Trader had positions in $8.3bn worth of index products ..about 10 times what he was allowed and 20% of the open interest…cannot believe that no one spotted this ..great risk controls at Goldman Sucks! Nice to know the World is in safe hands.These guys know how to hide positions..did it with Greece!!

6.French President Francois Hollande was forced to defend himself as critics questioned how much he knew about a secret foreign bank account that belonged to a former minister facing tax fraud charges.The minister in question was in charge of tax evasion..only in France,n’est pas?

7.Zombieland continues to look awful ..12% Unemployment region wide and now the Spanish Royals are being accused of fraud! Good look when the country is chocked full of unemployed! There are nearly 1.8m households where no one has got a job…now that is scary..really scary..let’s hope they have good TV and their teams win to keep them under control…

8.The US National Employment Report said on Wednesday that private employers added 158,000 jobs last month, falling short of economists’ expectations for 200,000 new jobs. The hiring was below the lowest estimates in a poll by Reuters and was the smallest gain since October.

9.After the Great Cyprus heist, the Italians are now solving their debt problem by targeting the Mafia… Overnight news broke that the Italian police have seized a record $1.7 billion in cash and property from a single person, a Sicilian “alternative energy” entrepreneur alleged to have close ties to the Mafia. As Bloomberg reports, Italy’s anti-Mafia investigators said in a statement today that Vito Nicastri, a 57-year-old native of Alcamo, near Trapani, was placed under surveillance and must remain in Alcamo for three years….Now I have watched all the Godfather movies so I am an expert…would think these guys won’t take too kindly to this new revenue raising method.

10.Commodities’ supercycle is “probably” over and prices are unlikely to match their performance over the past decade, according to UBS AG. Growth in China is slowing and becoming less commodity-intensive, London-based strategists Stephane Deo and Ramin Nakisa wrote in a report dated yesterday.

And finally……………..

A farmer named Paddy had a car accident. He was hit by a truck owned by the Eversweet Company.

In court, the Eversweet Company’s hot-shot solicitor was questioning Paddy:

‘Didn’t you say to the police at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine?’ asked the solicitor.

Paddy responded: ‘Well, I’ll tell you what happened. I’d just loaded my fav’rit cow, Bessie, into da… ‘

‘I didn’t ask for any details’, the solicitor interrupted. ‘Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine!’?’

Paddy said, ‘Well, I’d just got Bessie into da trailer and I was drivin’ down da road…. ‘

The solicitor interrupted again and said: ‘Your Honour, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the police on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident, he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question.’

By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Paddy’s answer and said to the solicitor: ‘I’d like to hear what he has to say about his favourite cow, Bessie’.

Paddy thanked the Judge and proceeded: ‘Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my fav’rit cow, into de trailer and was drivin’ her down de road when this huge Eversweet truck and trailer came tundering tru a stop sign and hit me trailer right in da side. I was trown into one ditch and Bessie was trown into da udder. By Jaysus I was hurt, very bad like, and didn’t want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moanin’ and groanin’. I knew she was in terrible pain just by her groans.

Shortly after da accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He could hear Bessie moanin’ and groanin’ too, so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.

Den da policeman came across de road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said: ‘How are you feelin’?’

‘Now wot da F&^% would you say?’

Go on you did miss me a little bit..say it’s worthwhile!!

Back on Sky TV at 5.30 Friday for Market Moves and Newcastle Radio today at 12.20!

Clarence

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